Long summer days

I thought about making this some random blog about like the ocean or something but then realized nobody cares about the ocean except for ocean-caring people. So then after a tremedous amount of thought I decided the ideal blog would be about amish. "Amish" you say, "who cares about amish?" And I reply, "Absolutely nobody in the entire world. Which is why it is the perfect blog, because it does not discriminate against anyone."

Anyways, the amish way of life is extremely simply and stupid. It is a religious order originally from Germany. However, they are so arrogant and idiotic that they developed their own version of the german language. Their pathetic excuse of religion does not allow them to own modern things like cars and electricity and running water. So to compensate for their deficiencies they require the assistance of normal people. They require their empolyers to deliver them to and from their homes before and after work. The "amish haulers" are usually not much better than the amish themselves, they stink, rarely have clean clothes and complain about everything that us "normal people" do. The area just north of P-Town is blessed with an infestation of this breed of human. There are several ironies about the amish however. Every single one of them has a cell phone, many with internet capabilities. Furthermore, this idiotic breed of amish believe that the economy is crap because people like me go to college and require higher paying jobs instead of going directly into the work force for minimum wage. Crazy right? Well other marvels of the amish include they refuse to own anything that need be plugged in to use however if it has a battery then they are more than willing to own it. My response to this stupid idea is, if the god that they believe in is so uptight about electricity do you honestly believe that there is a loop hole in the bible allowing battery powered gadgets? They are also raging alcoholics, chain smokers and pretty much completely incompetent. The amish do not pay property taxes and receive all schooling for free. This I do not understand. It's not like they are natives of the U.S.A. They immigrated here just like most everyone else so they have no inherent right to the land. And why should we educate them for free. They have no need of an education ever.

There are however several key advantages to hiring amish in the line of construction. They are pretty much without any knowledge of anything else except construction. You may wonder how is that an advantage. Well they do not know about health care and minimum wage and any other legal subsidiaries. So we can employ them for next to nothing. Not give them any compensation when they are injured on the job and require them to do jobs any normal person would refuse. Without intelligence they are merely pawns of the normal world. Brilliant people lead and idiots follow just ask Churchill.

All in all the amish race is unfortunately expanding but will hopefully all become so poor and uneducated that they are forced to become normal.

I'm not sure what to quote about after this blog so I am just going to throw out some favorites.
"Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious." Brendan Gill
"History will be kind to me for I intend to write it." Winston Churchill
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us, but pigs treat us as equals." Sir Winston Churchill

See everyone in a little over a month.

The Boys of Summer

The title refers to the name given to the Portland Rockets by our coach. Currently, your Portland Rockets dominated the USBC Classic in Ft. Wayne Indiana outscoring our opponents 21-3. Yes you may ask why even bother going when the competition is nowhere near your standards and I answer back because we got to play on Wizards Stadium. Yours truly is starting tonight if the rain ceases in the next hour or so. This will be my last start for quite some time because on Wednesday night at 9:02 p.m. the other boys of summer will be traveling to Colorado for a ten-day camping trip. The roommate, T2, farmboy and myself will be partaking in this adventure. We will be camping at approximately 11,000 ft. and this is not an RV trip. This is a backpack 6.5 miles up a mountain with all your supplies and be completely on your own for 10 days kinda thing. Pretty bitchin i know. Well the boss has walked by like 4 times and given me a dirty "I know you aren't working on what you're supposed to" look, so I will only take like 10 more minutes to find witty and inspiring quotes to end on.

"Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods." Aristotle
"A true friend doesn't bail you out of jail but is sitting beside you saying 'man that was fun.'" Don't remember but is still a classic

Summer days

Oh summer in P-town, what more can i say really? The Portland Rockets are dominating the USBC. I have pitched in like 10 games this summer and have pretty much kicked ass in all but one, but i don't count that one. I recently facebook stalked he who is to be named later and am not going to lie i kinda liked it. I'm sitting here at work now doing absolutely nothing except waiting on someone to return so i can go to Middlebury, IN then to Albion, IN. It will be a pretty awesome day of driving.

I should probably also make it known that I kinda have a girlfriend now. Yes its the same girl I go out with every summer, and NO ZAC she does not look like sean so fuck off. But who knows how it is going to end up.

I have finished a couple books and have decided i want to read War and Peace. I will be leaving for Colorado to go camping in the mountains on July 10, I am really looking forward to getting away from everything.

To all my faithful readers, Stay cool and when in doubt stick it in the two hole.