The mighty Spartans went to Texas this past week and got royally ass fucked by Texas flamethrowers. We showed up expecting another successful spring trip only to get beat in 12 innings game one 7-6 and slaughtered by the same team day 2 20-7. Fuck us right. Well our spirits were still high even though we lost purely from errors. Texas teams live and die by the fastball but they can mash the shit out of a fastball. Luckily, the might Spartans averaged 5 errors a game and didn't hit anything above 85 mph. We went into day three against a different team again wanting to dominate. We had our ace on the mound and high hopes of a victory. However, the errors continued and the pitching plummeted and we lost 10-7. Day 4 we traveled to the big D and with the change of scenery and surroundings we wanted and needed a victory. C-Mall jumped on the bump and started us out fabulously. We had a 6-3 lead going into the 7th and then yours truly came to take the ball. I finished strong allowing one hit and one run, however they were both in the 7th and it wasn't my run. He was left on base by Mallery. I completed the game for the save and the mighty Spartans came home victorious.
Chapter 5 of the future book:
You can f%$* the fat ones, you can f#@$ the ugly ones, but you cannot f&%* the fat, ugly ones.
And for Sir He Is To Be Named At A Later Point, different area codes and no commitment allows you to have an open and completely fun relationship to the point where you don't hurt yourself. It is like a test drive that allows you to truly see the best sides of both people and you can decide after you gather all necessary information which one is worth you. Best of luck bro.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Chapter 4 and then some
So I know that I was going to give all my faithful readers a point by point crash course in picking up their dream girl, however, after the initial pickup and encounter it is up to you not to be an idiot. I like to think that if you are yourself no matter what you will be much happier and less depressed every time you see your significant other. If you are forced to be someone you are not then bad things will always happen. So talk to her, but be yourself. Don't use words that you don't know the meaning to in order to sound smart. And don't talk like a thug to seem tough. Just be yourself.
On a lighter note. The baseball team got stuck in the mud at IU Southeast today and lost both games, 11-9 and 4-0. Yours truly was the lucky one to acquire the loss of game one. I came in in the clutch in the 4th inning with bases loaded and 1 out. Luckily I got out of that one unscathed after going 3-0 on a batter. The score was 7-4 at that time the mighty spartans were losing. The grenadiers then scored a run in the 5th only to be outmatched by a grand slam by corey oeding the following inning. With the score tied 8-8 yours truly once again went to the mound in the bottom of the 6th to give up a three run homer. This lead to disaster as we went on to lose 11-9. Fuck my life. Spartans are in action tomorrow at 1 o'clock against Marian College.
On a lighter note. The baseball team got stuck in the mud at IU Southeast today and lost both games, 11-9 and 4-0. Yours truly was the lucky one to acquire the loss of game one. I came in in the clutch in the 4th inning with bases loaded and 1 out. Luckily I got out of that one unscathed after going 3-0 on a batter. The score was 7-4 at that time the mighty spartans were losing. The grenadiers then scored a run in the 5th only to be outmatched by a grand slam by corey oeding the following inning. With the score tied 8-8 yours truly once again went to the mound in the bottom of the 6th to give up a three run homer. This lead to disaster as we went on to lose 11-9. Fuck my life. Spartans are in action tomorrow at 1 o'clock against Marian College.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Chapter 3
After you begin the conversation and have her attention don't be too needy. Give her space but not too much that she forgets you. And finally, the ultimate rule that I have disregarded several times, if you like her and she likes you and you are happy in a relationship, don't fuck it up. That is don't just break up with her for no apparent reason. You will live to regret it.
"You never know what you have until it's gone."
"You never know what you have until it's gone."
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Chapter 2
As I said earlier there are different ways to approach different situations. However, many of these situations are impossible to write about. You just have to be aware of your surroundings. Also, you have to be aware of yourself. No woman is out of reach! However, if you are stumbling when you walk and can't see straight it may not be wise for you to approach the girl. Unfortunately, it is these times that you have the most confidence and are most likely to say hello. Avoid these situations!!! Granted she may be a drinker and partier but the more you are able to keep control the more attractive you become. Girls don't want someone they have to babysit. So if it is at all possible avoid being drunk on your first encounter.
There are many different situations. For sake of not writing a thousands pages I will concentrate on one. You see a girl and simply want to get to know her better, not strictly sexually either. So, you have broken the ice and are now having a decent conversation. However, it gets to the point where talking stops and it becomes an awkward situation. At this point it is best to leave. Give a polite and courteous thank you and good bye and it was a pleasure to meet you. REMEMBER, its not worth chasing a girl all over to get her to like you. Either she does or she doesn't and you only have a little say in the matter. If she likes you after the conversation there is a good possiblity that if you keep an eye out, casually, then you could possibly do it again. The second time is a time for joking and casual teasing. Eliminate the awkward middle ground and begin joking and lightening up the mood. However, don't go too far. "You look slutty" is not a joke. Games, while sometimes cheesy, are great ways to begin poking fun at each other. If you begin the teasing and she responds positively, then you succeeded and are allowed to continue. But not too much. She is not your brother you cannot constantly haze her. Also, flirting is different from teasing. Flirting begins and ends with a smile, teasing with no regards to others reactions ends with you being alone again. After the flirting phase comes the being alone phase, however that's another blog.
"Three things have been difficult to tame: the oceans, fools and women. We may soon be able to tame the oceans; fools and women will take a little longer." Spiro T. Agnew
Don't be a fool and don't try to tame women, its a losing battle.
There are many different situations. For sake of not writing a thousands pages I will concentrate on one. You see a girl and simply want to get to know her better, not strictly sexually either. So, you have broken the ice and are now having a decent conversation. However, it gets to the point where talking stops and it becomes an awkward situation. At this point it is best to leave. Give a polite and courteous thank you and good bye and it was a pleasure to meet you. REMEMBER, its not worth chasing a girl all over to get her to like you. Either she does or she doesn't and you only have a little say in the matter. If she likes you after the conversation there is a good possiblity that if you keep an eye out, casually, then you could possibly do it again. The second time is a time for joking and casual teasing. Eliminate the awkward middle ground and begin joking and lightening up the mood. However, don't go too far. "You look slutty" is not a joke. Games, while sometimes cheesy, are great ways to begin poking fun at each other. If you begin the teasing and she responds positively, then you succeeded and are allowed to continue. But not too much. She is not your brother you cannot constantly haze her. Also, flirting is different from teasing. Flirting begins and ends with a smile, teasing with no regards to others reactions ends with you being alone again. After the flirting phase comes the being alone phase, however that's another blog.
"Three things have been difficult to tame: the oceans, fools and women. We may soon be able to tame the oceans; fools and women will take a little longer." Spiro T. Agnew
Don't be a fool and don't try to tame women, its a losing battle.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Woman Chronicles
So I have been talking to friends lately and after several extensive conversations I have decided that I should write a book of all the things I know or think I know about women. And seeing as how I only really know of one woman who reads this blog I am hoping that her comments will help perfect my comments.
There are not very many things that I know but there are things that I do know and situations that I have been in that others would benefit from. When I was younger I was always afraid to make initial contact with girls. However, once I started talking to them it was easy to keep a conversation going. So the initial icebreaker was always the problem. There are a few guys who use lines to get a girls initial attention. I am a firm believer that if you try too hard she will be able to see right through you. And you never want her to know your ultimate intentions. A casual conversation and a subtle goodbye is always more beneficial than a cheesy line and following her around all night. Girls know if they are interested from the first word you say. If your first line is about a polar bear, you may get a laugh but you'll also be alone that night. If you start a conversation casually and leave when the conversation is done. There is a chance that you will run into each other again that night. And if you were actually able to talk to her there may be a chance that she doesn't think you're just like every other guy and give you another chance.
An icebreaker does not start with the word "I." It usually is a question. You notice something about her that you have in common and ask her about it. When she responds then share how you are connected. But not too much. She doesn't want you to walk across the room to talk about yourself. Tell enough to stimulate further conversation but not so much that she turns and leaves. If you walk up to her and go completely blank don't freak out. A stuttering start is not always a bad thing. Keep to the plan and ask her something. If you fail and walk away there is still a chance that later on you and her will be able to laugh about your awful failure. It is only a failure if you fail to correct it. Women aren't scary but conversations are. Your major objective is to start talking and don't stick your foot in your mouth. Once you say it, you can't take it back. Keep in mind there are different ways to approach different women and different ways to act depending on your intentions. But I will talk about those later.
"It is with our passions, as it is with fire and water, they are good servants but bad masters." Aesop
There are not very many things that I know but there are things that I do know and situations that I have been in that others would benefit from. When I was younger I was always afraid to make initial contact with girls. However, once I started talking to them it was easy to keep a conversation going. So the initial icebreaker was always the problem. There are a few guys who use lines to get a girls initial attention. I am a firm believer that if you try too hard she will be able to see right through you. And you never want her to know your ultimate intentions. A casual conversation and a subtle goodbye is always more beneficial than a cheesy line and following her around all night. Girls know if they are interested from the first word you say. If your first line is about a polar bear, you may get a laugh but you'll also be alone that night. If you start a conversation casually and leave when the conversation is done. There is a chance that you will run into each other again that night. And if you were actually able to talk to her there may be a chance that she doesn't think you're just like every other guy and give you another chance.
An icebreaker does not start with the word "I." It usually is a question. You notice something about her that you have in common and ask her about it. When she responds then share how you are connected. But not too much. She doesn't want you to walk across the room to talk about yourself. Tell enough to stimulate further conversation but not so much that she turns and leaves. If you walk up to her and go completely blank don't freak out. A stuttering start is not always a bad thing. Keep to the plan and ask her something. If you fail and walk away there is still a chance that later on you and her will be able to laugh about your awful failure. It is only a failure if you fail to correct it. Women aren't scary but conversations are. Your major objective is to start talking and don't stick your foot in your mouth. Once you say it, you can't take it back. Keep in mind there are different ways to approach different women and different ways to act depending on your intentions. But I will talk about those later.
"It is with our passions, as it is with fire and water, they are good servants but bad masters." Aesop
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Women
Ever since I can remember I have been able to talk to women without much problem. However, the women that I tend to talk to the most are those who are in some form of a commitment. Furthermore, it seems like the only girls who I want to talk to are committed. By the time I get done "having fun" all the good ones are already taken and the only single ones are single for a reason. For instance, all of the girls i hang out with now are either in a relationship or there is something that makes them undatable to me. Furthermore, out of all the girls that I have had any sexual experience with, over half were in a relationship with someone else at the time. Don't worry it is none of the people who read this blog nor was it your girlfriend. Also, I have always been a flirt with most all women and like to compliment and be complimented. So if I flirt with you it is probably harmless unless you are one particular person and then it is because that you are the perfect girl, but I'll leave her nameless. Well on to the events of the day.
Today was probably one of the best days of my life when it comes to women. I can only think of one day that compares and it was in fifth grade before I had even hit puberty. Today seemed to be filled with beautiful women and all of them seemed to be flirting with me as much as I was flirting with them. Granted several of them were in a relationship but that's just a minor technicality. I saw girls today that I had never seen before. There were girls in my classes that stood out more than normal and talked to me randomly and girls in the training room and weight room during practice. Girls everywhere. Hopefully tomorrow is half as good as what today was. And hopefully Charlemagne is in a good mood again tomorrow because I think her mood determines my mood. Well this is long enough so I will end on a few quotes.
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence."
"I like intelligent women, when you go out it shouldn't be a staring contest." Frank Sinatra
"What valor cannot win, flattery may." Publilius Syrus
Today was probably one of the best days of my life when it comes to women. I can only think of one day that compares and it was in fifth grade before I had even hit puberty. Today seemed to be filled with beautiful women and all of them seemed to be flirting with me as much as I was flirting with them. Granted several of them were in a relationship but that's just a minor technicality. I saw girls today that I had never seen before. There were girls in my classes that stood out more than normal and talked to me randomly and girls in the training room and weight room during practice. Girls everywhere. Hopefully tomorrow is half as good as what today was. And hopefully Charlemagne is in a good mood again tomorrow because I think her mood determines my mood. Well this is long enough so I will end on a few quotes.
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence."
"I like intelligent women, when you go out it shouldn't be a staring contest." Frank Sinatra
"What valor cannot win, flattery may." Publilius Syrus
Monday, February 9, 2009
Urges and Desires
As the title cleverly points out this blog is about those little urges and desires that push us to do things that we normally would not always pursue. For instance, I was sitting at my desk reading for Empire when someone mentioned a box of chocolates. Immediately I was craving some chocolate. So I took my last two dollars and went to the vending machine and purchased a bag of peanut M&Ms and a crunchy butterfinger. Both of which were phenomenal.
Those may be my only urges for the blog, or at least the only ones that are PG rated. So onto desires. At the convo this morning, which was a thorough let down if you didn't attend, I began to realize that I should be a little more conscious of where I am spending and how much. And if you know me then you know that I am an impulse buyer and pay very little attention to the cost of things if I really want it. Speaking of which, my mother called me earlier this week and said that my debit card was reporting fraudulent charges and that my pin number would be changed in a few days no matter what. Which pisses me off because I have my card with me and checked my account online and my cousin is my loan officer at the bank and I still have to change my pin. It's stupid. Almost as stupid as me saying pin number earlier, because if you think about it I just said personal identification number number. It's like ATM Machine. Just ridiculous. But I'm going to end this random tangent and conclude my blog with a few quotes.
"Never give up, never surrender" Buzz Lightyear
"Don't take life to seriously, you'll never get out alive." VanWilder
Those may be my only urges for the blog, or at least the only ones that are PG rated. So onto desires. At the convo this morning, which was a thorough let down if you didn't attend, I began to realize that I should be a little more conscious of where I am spending and how much. And if you know me then you know that I am an impulse buyer and pay very little attention to the cost of things if I really want it. Speaking of which, my mother called me earlier this week and said that my debit card was reporting fraudulent charges and that my pin number would be changed in a few days no matter what. Which pisses me off because I have my card with me and checked my account online and my cousin is my loan officer at the bank and I still have to change my pin. It's stupid. Almost as stupid as me saying pin number earlier, because if you think about it I just said personal identification number number. It's like ATM Machine. Just ridiculous. But I'm going to end this random tangent and conclude my blog with a few quotes.
"Never give up, never surrender" Buzz Lightyear
"Don't take life to seriously, you'll never get out alive." VanWilder
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